Having just set up our website – www.abortion-alternativeinformationandrecovery.org – we now have to promote it, get people to know about it so that it has a chance of getting to the people for whom it may be a source of help. With a fairly large dose of naivety I walked right into the lion’s den and posted some messages about us on “pro-choice” FB pages. Wow! The vitriol, hatred, abusiveness and contempt that a couple of people started pouring on me was matched by relentless ideological bulldozing that presents the whole issue as though it were simple, clear, all sewn-up and obvious… how far from the truth.
Don’t get me wrong. I’m sure if I posted a pro-choice message on some pro-life FB pages, I would get something of a similar response. And this is specifically in the context of the US, of course – in Europe, one is more likely to be overwhelmed with indifference and apathy talking about abortion than passion and hatred. What it makes me realise, not for the first time, is that ideological battling is so unreal and so uncompassionate in terms of the way people actually suffer around abortion. The suffering that leads to abortion in the first place, the silent suffering that comes afterwards.
The pro-choice people really don’t want to know about that suffering, dismissing women who suffer guilt, grief and regret as poor saps who should have known better and who are just getting in the way of the strong, independent, tough and right-minded women who know their own minds and have to have a free right to control their own bodies. How unreal it makes the conventional pro-life position seem… two universes that will absolutely never meet. One thing is for sure. We want to speak up for the women who would have willingly chosen to love and nurture their baby if they had been welcomed by their surroundings but who were basically abandoned and shamed into “clearing the problem up” for everyone else by going to an abortion clinic and agreeing to have their heart broken and their soul damaged.
Few people want to know… then or now. But we must speak up and tell our truth nonetheless.